239. The Narcissist Trap {with Sandi}

This is really what it's like being in a relationship with the narcissist. Or with someone with. Borderline personality disorder. It is scary. Uh, Sandy is saying. This is why.

And it's so Scary, scary, and then they pull you back in, and pull you back in again, and pull you back in. But there's one night, I remember it was in August and he pulls some shit, and he's just rail, railing me. And I'm in my bedroom, and we're standing here, yelling. He's yelling at me, like crazy. And I wanted to punch him in the face so bad. I was full of rage. And I was just like, I don't listen. You're not hearing anything. Anything. I could be calm, not hearing it. I could be medium, not hearing it. I could be clear, I could do it this way, say it this way. I could do it this way. Nothing. Not hearing it. He had to be right and he had to put me down. And then, He's right in front of my face and I was gonna I have a mean right hook, dude. And... Boom! I didn't hit his face, which I should've. But I hit my glass sliding door, and I screwed up my hand. That's gonna, I'm gonna get some ice for this. No blood happened, just a little swelling, some bruising action, but I was like, I should have just laid him out. And second thought was, this fella would have pressed charges on me if I did. You know what I mean? So glad I did that and got myself out of my stuck

am too.

on that, you know,

I don't think anything makes me more inspired and in awe than seeing a woman get out of her stock in a relationship like that. I don't think anything gives me more like power or not power. Like it's not giving me power, but I'm just so grateful. Gratitude. I'm just so glad.

and I can't wait to like like help somebody else that's been in it, too But then wait, it gets even better. Hey guys Listening cuz guess what? He did it again. He pulled me back in again. Yup. he was my mechanic on my car, and I have a food truck that's a trolley, and he was a mechanic on that. So now I don't have a mechanic, so that's cool. That's cool, though. I'll find myself a mechanic. So, he was working on my Esther, my Pathfinder. And he couldn't figure it out, whatever the heck was wrong with it, and he like weaseled his way back in. Again, I don't know how they do it. It's so very strange.

good at it. Oh my god.

God,

They really know how to get to our sensitivities to get through to our empathetic tendencies, our, gifts. They know how to manipulate us.

that's so crazy. How does that, okay, sidebar, but how does that happen in somebody? Cause we're not born like that.

I don't

That's just wild. That's wild. So he did it again and again. So gave me I get to celebrate, celebrate. I got out. I got out. Solid done, two weeks ago. That timestamp because he pulled this maneuver, guys. I'll just buy you a car. I'm done working on Esther. Like, I don't know. I can't figure it out. You need a new car for you and your kids. To be safe going up and down this hill, and I was just like, God damn it. I said, okay, well, you are not buying me a car. Let's be clear about this. I will pay you back. You are getting paid back. And it took about six months for me to pay him back. And I did sell Esther two weeks ago. To a beautiful kiddo, like everything was just universal, like bam, bam, bam, a lot of attraction. his mom came to check out the car and I was listening to Abraham Hicks. it is loud, because I love the sound system in my Aster, that's the name of my car. And I'm like, cleaning the windows because it's dusty up here in the mountains. And she came in to check it out, and she's like, oh my gosh, you named her Aster? You listen to Abraham, aren't you? I'm like, yeah! She's like, oh my god, we high five and hug, and it was just like, instant. The car was for her son, who was getting his license. In a couple of weeks and he saved up his money and I'm like, yes, parents that are like how my parents were. You want a car? You can buy it yourself. We'll chip in a little bit to help you this time. This is a big responsibility. This is a big deal. And that felt like home to me I had had her on the market girl for four months. Looking for a buyer and this was just like perfect, everything, timing, everything, situation, person, everything. And then that, next day Parker came and checked her out and was just gushing over her and, oh my gosh, hugs and all of that. And I told her, you know, what's wrong in all situations, like, ah, no big deal. Ah, no big deal. We can fix that. Yep. You know? No big deal. And I. So, then I, after I got paid, I Venmo'd, uh, what's his nuts? His money. The funniest thing is, he's like, two days later, he's like, hey, so if you haven't sold Esther, can you, uh, give me the title for the car that, kind of like, dude, do you check your Venmo at all? Like, check your Venmo, honey. Oh my god! So, yeah.

Congratulations.

Thank you.

No more ties to him. She can be free now, will she? Stick around. And listen tomorrow to see how she manages because a narcissist really doesn't let go. We have two. Because they will not. You can either buy me a coffee or book yourself a session with me and we can have coffee together online, or in person, if you're in Bennington, which I've already said is highly unlikely and I always will, but please do come visit. It's amazing. It's beautiful. That is@buymeacoffee.com slash 1 0 0 ways. And until next time we are sending all the love. And support. And then some more. We'll talk tomorrow.