213. It's Not Personal {with Olivera}

Today, we're talking about not taking anything personally. So I'm going to share a story with you from work. I work in retail at the moment. The whole story's too long, but suffice it to say, this woman told me, like, it is. Without having any context. And then when she was leaving. I thanked her for coming in Which I do. Always if I can, And she looked at me. And it was just like, Thank me. For telling you, you were chatting, which. It wasn't but her perspective was that I was just up there chatting. And I said, No for coming in. We appreciate it. And she keeps walking out. She's just like, turns me. Don't be sarcastic. I was like, I'm not. I hope you have a good night. So I could've taken that personally, but obviously that's a, her issue, not a me issue.

Nothing is personal. Nothing. Nothing. Anyone says is personal I can take a look at what you said to me and look at myself like objectively Is there any truth in like if you say you're a liar? Yes. I have lied in my life So you're right like why you know, like in general, I wouldn't take that quote unquote personally no real personal issue here. It's just somebody sharing opinions.

Uh, exactly, such as, you have a cute dress on right now and I said I like your shirt and you said it's dress and I said I like your dress. That wasn't personal, it's not about you, I like your dress, it's about me and what I like.

Thank you. Yeah. But people don't see that. I think pointing it out is a good reminder.

Yeah.

Like I like to care for people. I like to care for people. I feel good when I do that.

Yeah.

love feeding people and I, that, that makes me feel good. It has nothing to do with you and that you like my cupcakes. That's just a bonus maybe, you know, you can you can not like my cupcakes So my happiness would depend on you. Hell, no, I wouldn't put that in your hands

Yeah, no, that's, that's dangerous right

so I make food because it makes me happy regardless of what you think about it

Yeah, same.

So your opinion is not personal to me Your opinion is just your opinion

Yeah,

if I made crappy food and I gave it to the guy on the street who you know Just eats Cheetos. He would love it. So it's all relative. Yeah, again,

I agree.

it's funny how we take things personally. It really is. It's so destructive when we take it in like, Oh my God, I'm stupid. I'm bad. I'm short. I'm fat. I'm whatever all the things that people say about us.

Mm hmm. I was just gonna say what if somebody's angry about something that you did and They tell you how much it hurt them.

Well, I can empathize. Always. I can say, I'm sorry you feel like that. Tell me more.

Yeah, like what Happened that created this feeling in you, but it doesn't again, it's not personal to you. It's sort of like if anybody would have done whatever happened to have that person react that way, they would have reacted that way. It's not you. It's still them. But some people are really good at making people feel guilty or wrong or something like that. And, uh, that can be really difficult, but it's still not personal.

It's still not personal. It's just someone expressing something. it's self expression.

I feel like there's not much else to say about this one. Honestly. It's just like, don't take anything personally. It's one of the four agreements.

Read the book.

Oh my God. Read the book. Yeah. Read the book. I'll link it in the show notes. I don't have any affiliate and I don't care. Just read that book.

Yeah, there are a lot of good things to, I don't want to say just read, but to re read. From time to time, either daily, weekly, monthly, whenever you get that kind of you get in your head or you feel like something's very personal, you can always reach out and remind yourself through a quote or Something, a passage in a book because, you know, life is sticky and we, we do get funneled in to all the drama and we forget that life is not very personal. So I think reminders like that are helpful until we can kind of do it maybe less. We don't have to do it so much with the reminders. And if we do, who cares?

Good point. It's not personal.

It's not personal. Whatever. I always say, whatever works to get you back to yourself. And remind yourself of all these things. Do it. It's worth it. Keep, keep yourself on track.

Beautiful.

Yeah,

Hmm, thank you.

you're welcome. It can be easier. That's all I know. Life can be much, much easier. Truly.

I mean, that's it. Duh. Follow the duh.

We're going to follow the da right into the tarot card for November tomorrow on sub Wayne Halloween. I am doing the tarot card on the last day of the month, because the first day of the month is Wednesday Odin's day. And we are doing. The rune number 13. Which is awesome because 13. is thought to be a scary number, but actually it's the goddess number. So yet it's scary because we wake you. That's what's coming at you tomorrow. Go to buy me a coffee.com/ 1 0, 0 ways. If you'd like to support the show or support yourself through a session with me. Until next time we're sending all the love and then somewhere we'll talk tomorrow