209. How to Make Decisions Easily {with Olivera}

I have one of my favorite people. In the world on with me today, and we are going to talk about how to make decisions. Easily. This is something I have definitely struggled with. She has definitely struggled with. And you may be struggling with now. Find out how decisions can actually beat. Easy with allavara and me today

ooh, that's good. I can tell you a lot about how I used to make decisions.

Let's go.

Used to suck. Life was very hard back in the day when I was in my head.

Right. Oh my God.

Yeah, when I didn't know what to do, I literally felt like I was at a crossroads all the time, but literally all the time. I couldn't decide. From the simplest thing from do I want to eat this or that, nevermind, you know, some major life decisions, very, very indecisive, very unclear, very confused. It seemed, I usually let other people make the decision for me because I was so unable. I didn't like it. I knew I didn't like it, but I felt like I didn't have that ability. Somehow, life passed me by and didn't school me on that. yeah, it was really hard. I felt dumb as a grown up. So, yeah, not easy. pleasant to sit in that seat.

I can resonate with that a lot, feeling dumb as a grown up, and also feeling like you're literally at a crossroads all the time. But also that one of the ways is the right way, one of the ways is the wrong way, and I didn't know which was which, and I was afraid, afraid of taking the wrong one. Which made making decisions harder, because like, what if I made the wrong choice?

Exactly. I've heard this from so many people, myself included, like, if I pick one, the other one, which one is right? Yeah, that's living in the world of right and wrong and living from your head again. It's all in the head, right? I didn't use any of my, the rest of my body, my intuition or my heart, or just kind of sit for a minute and feel, know, just like pick it up from the air or whatever, anywhere else. Yeah. I didn't go any to any of those places. It was either yes or no, and that was very clear and decision could never be made from that place.

now what? Or, okay, we're going to go now what? And then we're going to go what was the transition like? So what now? Let's do now what first?

now as opposed to being in my head?

Yeah, how do you make decisions now? that's even a thing we do? I don't know that I make decisions,

I know that's what's going through my head. Um, I'll say this. I can verbally say, I made a decision, but it's not true because I don't feel like I made this decision. Yes, me, Olivera, yes, this is the I that made the decision, but when I sit and I feel and I tune in and I go into my heart and my soul and deeper, whatever, you know, that is a decision is made. Something comes to the surface and then Olivera just says. I have a decision. That's how it happens today. I don't own any of those decisions. Really. They come from something that's like built in that's inherent, that's already there. And I just have to be quiet enough to hear it. And then I know that that is the quote unquote answer or way.

Yeah. It's like when people ask me, Oh, what made you decide to move to Vermont? And it's like, Oh, do you think that was like really a conscious, okay, now I'm going to go live in New England. No.

Yeah, it's funny. It's, I don't want to I keep saying it's hard to describe, but I don't want to keep saying that I was just talking to my mom about this the other day, I was trying to explain to her the flow of life. And how she gets overwhelmed and how to do one thing and then another thing and then another thing because all of the things come all at once. It's kind of the same way when you make a decision, you know, a decision has to be made for whatever reason. And it seems overwhelming. The one thing that is like highlighted, but not urgent feeling, not fear feeling, not forced feeling, but something that's like in the foreground. That's the answer. The one that's the strongest, but not fear based, not coming from some lower energy, negative energy, something that doesn't feel good.

Yeah.

So it has to be more like excitement or curiosity or that kind of feeling

I call it the lightest path.

the lightest path I, again, we, you know, we have different words for this process and the question that we're trying to answer here.

And I actually love that you brought these words up because I think that sometimes when I say the lightest path, people think that it means that it's all happy and positive

And easy,

sparkly and easy and the lightest path is by no means necessarily the easiest path.

easily be misunderstood to be the easiest, which would be wrong.

Well, it would be, it's funny because the easiest path can, if it's not the lightest path, this is where semantics comes in. But if the easiest path is, path is not the lightest path, it is very, uh, it's the wrong path. And I, there is no right and wrong, but you will feel like you made the wrong decision.

exactly, exactly. Yeah, that's the tricky part. But once you get it, once you kind of. Get that feeling. It's energetic, right? We're talking about energetic things. We're just giving it name. Like sometimes I tell my daughter, sometimes the decision that has to be made will be the hardest decision, but it will be the right one. It will feel like the right one, even though I have maybe mountains to climb kind of feeling, but it just, at the end of the day, when I put my head on the pillow, it's still the right. that rightness that

Yeah.

this is okay ness. Yeah.

That's it.

And then you go in that direction and then any obstacle that you have or anything that needs to be done is somehow done because you're in the, you're with yourself. You're with your nature. You're not going against something. You're not in some lower energy, lazy energy or whatever.

you just said it, you're with yourself.

What can you do right now to get with yourself, to get on your own team? Tomorrow, we're going to continue this conversation. And share how we found. Our way to get with ourselves. I hope you join us for that. Until then we are sending all our love and then somewhere. We'll talk tomorrow